My Mind is on the Blink

At first the fatigue is almost luxurious, like you just had a fun, late night the night before and you get to go to bed early to make up for it.  Sinking into bed is the best sensation on earth, and you feel pleasantly foggy around the edges.

And after a few weeks, you start to wonder if you will ever be able to hold a conversation after 7 pm. Or remember where your glasses are before 7 am. Or where are your keys. Or your phone. Or your shoes.  Or oh please Little A., just don't poop for a couple of hours, because Mama forgot to bring the diaper bag. 

We won't even discuss the futile absurdity that is me attempting to work a new job at this moment.  I have cried hot tears of frustration more times than...well, just about anything will make me cry. Please don't make me drive past that road-killed fox again, send me any cute videos, or make me watched Tangled again, Little A., because the end? <SPOILER ALERT> Where Rapunzel is reunited with her family? It will make me cry. And I will have to tell you Mama is crying because they are all so happy! again. Happy tears are a very difficult concept.  Walking around with squishy, stupid emotions, like an overripe peach in the bottom of a backpack is difficult.

And hungry? SO. FUCKING. HUNGRY. I don't remember ever being so hungry so often ever in my life! Ever! On Saturday, I ate Chipolte twice: a big-ass salad sitting there in the store, and a big-ass burrito at home a few hours later. And still needed a snack at 10 pm. On the plus side, I am becoming expert at no-crumbs-in-bed sandwich consumption.

Yeah, so. These are my major malfunctions -- so, so minor compared to some ladies' (so thankful every day that I am not a puker), but boy this pregnancy thing sure can make life just a wee bit more difficult.  Second trimester starts today! Wanna come over and eat a whole pizza with me to celebrate? Promise I won't cry (in front of you).

ALSO if you wouldn't mind, please drink a margarita for me, and write me to tell me all about it. For the love of all that is holy DRINK A MARGARITA.

Please.

xoxo, A