Discombobulation Station

I Ain't Missin You...

Oh my, but did you a little? Your E. hath been missing. Can I confess, a bit of ye olde ennui has hit me. A. tried to tell me its the change of seasons and it's like we think there's something new to start, but there isn't, because we're sortof 30 (two) and ain't nothing new, like another season of superbowl commercials but that's where I am. Seeing my future. For the next five (ouch I just counted!) months and I know what my life is going to be like. Crazy. Lazy. Then crazy. Avail on the cellular tellular. Why do I complain?

When I meet with my tutoring student, and this is totally confidential but I'm pretty sure neither her son nor does his wife work and she works two jobs and takes care of the baby the second she gets home, and sleeps with her and she wakes up at 4am for a feeding and for a change and then my student is up at 6am for work to work her two jobs and...what do the other people in the house do? Sounds like, sleep. Which is great and all but. Just goes to show that if this 68 year old woman can find the time to come and and learn a bit, and when I say bit, I mean bit, of English with me, which mostly consists of me pushing her and her wanting to socialize, which we do for half the time well then...

Do you even know how well you have it? Her other son was carjacked last week. This is in my neighborhood mind you. Where a few weeks ago some guy was sizing up my scooter to see if it might fit in his trunk. Her son had some tooth damage from some blows to the face, from what I gathered, so I grabbed a flyer off the wall for affordable dentistry.

But back to the point. I don't think this is a hit, but I still have my diary here you see, from 1987, so I feel obligated to give another dose:

April 14, 1987

Dear Diary,

Who would like me? I'm flat chested (but growing) [ed. note: bless, not too much more], ugly, I have pimples,and my personality stinks. Johnny has told people that he liked me before, but that was to get AR jealous. I hurt so bad then. Almost every sixth grader has gone with him. All right, he's a slut, but I enjoy his company. Actually, I get queasy whenever I see him. You see, every time I see him, he does something to embarrass me, But I never get embarrassed! Today me, Julie, representatives and the whole sixth grade went to the old folks home. I kept on looking at him, and once in a while he would glance at me. Who would like me?

Yours,

E

Which leaves the age old question -- has my seduction tactic changed at all? I mean, if he looks at me in the old folks home, its ON, right?

E's birthday post

and i'm totes not saying i'm sober. my capitalization is also bad, because i've been IM'ing lustily all day too. Monday off ya know. Its been fab. But I feel (whoah! capitalization is coming back) that its time for the more interesting diary entry now. Analyze as you see fit. Its literally the next entry:

April 13, 1987
Dear Diary,
I finally found somebody I like. My 2nd best friend AH, just happens to like the very same guy. His name is Johnny, he has blue eyes and blonde hair, in other words, he is gorgeous. I have liked him for the longest time, but I couldn't tell AH because she has was going steady, well not too steady, with him. You see, they broke up 3 times, but they always got together again. He told his cousin, Melissa, in the 8th grade, that he actually liked me! O my god! Melissa is good friends with AH, and AH told me, but I think she told Julie first!
Your friend,
E.

LOTS going on here. I also found letters to AH (whose name I am randomly abbreviating, only because its unique) during this last trip home, photocopied them and sent them to her with many questions about our apparent love-triangle. It seems as if we were more intrigued with our own friendship to be honest with you. But I do wonder what ole Johnny Blue Eyes is up to now. Just you wait until I scan the love letters. There were loads of illustrations. I was smitten. Where are the traced cartoon characters nowadays? Where's the love?

E

A Religious Day, Corporate Guilt, Parental Angst

You voted for it, so here it is, another installment of E's 7th grade diary.

April 12, 1987
Dear Diary,
Palm Sunday is a time of rejoice. We had the longest gospel at church. They acted out the passion. We got palms and I got some for John because he is away at camp. He must have got rained on. When he got home he was real sick. I went to kmart today. I don't like to but I was just tagging along with Rachel. I bought a cup. I asked Dad if he could pick me up at Rachel's but he went to her Dad's instead of her Mom's. Of course, I got yelled at!
Your friend,
Ellen

I never realized I was such a pious little girl. I can totally imagine the chewing out I got for being at the wrong house, however. Stuff like that still happens to me when I go home. But I do get a point for disliking kmart, no? Although I was probably trying to reassure my diary that I had better taste than that. You see the diary is my "friend" - later I treat it like God. That should be interesting. 

E.

Childhood Diary

I know this is somewhat cliche in the blogging world. My mom even emailed me about one. But I have to say I grabbed my diary when I was home last in Cleveland. All my stuff is in my brother's closet, and I was looking for some old books and spent a few hours going through my middling to average high school essays. My mom caught me and I affirmed her worst fears: I was really not a very ambitious student. I guess (I hope) writing is where its at because I'm no rocket scientist. Or never cared to be. But another thing I sequestered away in my carry-on is a little white flowered diary, you know the kind with the little lock on it? Oh yes. And I wrote it in pretty earnestly. I do remember my mom found one of my diaries once. Not this one, but a black notebook (high school, of course). She declared it "boring," after she told me she read the entire thing. Note kids: do not leave your diaries behind when you go off to college. They will be read, and criticized.

But this stuff is pretty good. Or so I think. So I leave it up to you. I will now transcribe the second entry (the first is actually too scandalous to share) and if you likey, I will randomly and not so faithfully share more.

April 11, 1987
Dear Diary,
Today is beautiful. It rained a little but I like to get wet. I went to Rachel's party today and I met some neat kids. One is Megan and she's really crazy! I like her! The other is Christy and she is allergic to eggs, penut [sic] butter, and most everything else. I really feel sorry for her. They are both in 5th grade but they are very mature. I noticed that some people use the word queer, but it also means gay.
Your friend,
E

Amazing moment in my life when I learned that people use "queer" as a descriptive. Don't worry it gets better. But I'll let you be the judge of that. Two votes or more will probably do the trick.

E.

(who is confined to her bedroom and the computer because of the excessive heat in Chicago)